Mickey MacConnell
Singer / Songwriter / Journalist
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Mick MacConnell My View...
For many years Mickey has been a columnist with "The Kerryman " newspaper where his column "My View..." appears every week. Due to the number of requests I have had from all his friends out there who can't get their hands on "The Kerryman" and would like to keep up to speed with "My view ...", I have decided to post the occasional column. Maura
Wednesday, August 20th. 2008 Farewell to Ronnie - a true icon The one and only time I met Ronnie Drew was late at night in the Residents’ Lounge of a hotel in Tipperary after we had both appeared at a concert during a Peace Festival there. We got to talking over a few drinks and, truth to tell, I found it very hard to warm to the man.
I found his manner to be a strange mixture of pomposity and condescension, and truth to tell, I’m not very comfortable with either of these two personality traits. I was somewhat surprised because I had been told that he was a very affable man noted for his wit and wisdom and had a very large circle of close friends in the music business.
However, irrespective of my experiences that night, I mourn his passing as he was undoubtedly an iconic figure who was enormously important in musical terms. His distinctive gravelly voice was his trademark and along with his fellow Dubliners he provided the soundtrack for the days of our youth when life was good and anything was possible. Many would say that he played a very important part in preserving a vital part of our musical heritage and who am I to argue with that.
Away back in the days when I was a young lad and embarking on a life long journey of music, musicians were not particularly highly regarded. In fact, those who played music were regarded with suspicion and even hostility. There were many who felt that playing Irish traditional music was to somehow remind us all of our peasant backgrounds and that it had no purpose except to reopen the scars inflicted by poverty and rebellion. That perception was changed totally in the years that followed through the efforts of people like Ronnie, Luke Kelly, and all their compatriots.
I suppose if I were to be totally honest I would have to admit that I owe a great deal to Ronnie in that he was a brand leader par excellence. It was he who made it perfectly acceptable for small, bearded battered men with musically challenged vocal chords to take to the stage and get away with it. Not only that, he proved to the world that it was possible to have a bad voice and still be a great singer. There is no doubt about it, when Ronnie sang a song it stayed sung.
I’m sorry that I didn’t get to know him
better and spend a bit more time in his company. God grant him eternal
rest after a hard lived musical lifetime in a world that is now a
sadder place because his voice has been stilled. But his memory will
live on in his songs peopled with Dublin shawlies, street gurriers
and echoes of the cobblestones of a Dublin that is long since dead
and gone. Costs hinder information flow I was horrified to read that the HSE is demanding €53,000 from Fine Gael TD, Fergus O’Dowd to answer questions about the plight of elderly people in nursing homes under the Freedom of Information Act. This appalling demand was made after the deputy who has been campaigning for years for better standards of care for the elderly attempted to secure information on the number of incidents were vulnerable elderly patients have been left without qualified nursing cover.
To my mind, any reasonable person would be forced to the conclusion that such a demand is nothing more than a barefaced attempt to deny the release of embarrassing information. This makes a total mockery of the Freedom Of Information Acts that were put in place in order to shine a light into some of the murkier corners of our society.
Since its introduction successive governments have whittled away at the legislation in an attempt to limit the free flow of information to the public. This is merely the latest example of an ongoing strategy to cloak embarrassing truths by making it far too expensive for the ordinary man or woman in the street to find out the truth about how our country works.
Deputy O’Dowd was told that “after careful consideration and consultations” it had been decided that the overall fee involved in answering his request for information would be €53,042. He was further told that before any work could be done on his queries he would be required to pay a deposit of €10,608.
It is impossible to disagree with the Deputy when he says that it is his belief that the attempt to impose such costs represents a serious attempt to clamp down on the ability of TD’s to ask serious questions about the state of our health services. He added that it was shocking that the HSE imposes the sort of censorship that allowed scandals such as Leas Cross to fester.
The situation has now arisen where the only people
who can afford to elicit information under the legislation are either
the extremely well heeled or the newspaper industry. The impositions
of such huge costs make it impossible for the ordinary citizen to
gain access to information that they have a right to know. Surely
it would be a lot more honest to scrap the Freedom Of Information
Acts because they are not worth the paper they are written on. Russia "totally justified in takingdefensive action..." It seems totally outrageous to me that Russia is facing the combined wrath of the Western world because it decided to defend itself against totally unprovoked aggression by the neighbouring state of Georgia. Any rational person would have to agree that the Russians were totally justified in taking defensive action in the circumstances.
Emboldened by false promises of American and European Union support and buoyed up by the promise of being allowed to join NATO, the Georgian government launched a totally unjustified, immoral and illegal attack on South Ossettia and got its nose bloodied as a result. As is always the case, the false promises turned out to be just that and the powerful allies who promised so much failed to live up to their words.
As a result, villages lie in ruins and it is innocent civilians that have paid a ruinous price. Several thousand people have died and lives have been destroyed as a result of this criminal adventure. The entire area has been destabilized and the atmosphere has degenerated to something similar at the height of the Cold War. The Georgian government has a hell of a lot to answer for.
The events there remind us all of the dangers of picking
a fight with a more powerful opponent. It is said that it is a wise
general that picks his battlefield and it would appear that there
are very few wise generals in that troubled part of the world.
Wednesday, July 30th. 2008 Agony as men brought to book The love affair has ended! My heart has been broken and I find myself a broken man! My beloved has proved herself false and treacherous and, even worse, to be a hardhearted bitch that should never have been allowed through my door. Regular readers of this column will recall my falling in love a month or two ago with a certain female by the name of Blanche Ebbutt who, in 1913, published a book entitled “Don’ts For Wives” which I immediately hailed as a literary and moral masterpiece. Such was the wisdom and understanding contained in this pocket-sized manual that I instantly lost my heart to my beloved Blanche and vowed that she would always occupy a special place in my heart. Alas, the love affair was doomed right from the word go. Imagine my horror when I discovered that my long dead love had the temerity and treachery to publish a companion volume entitled “Don’ts For Husbands”, a book that is poisonous in the extreme and contains a litany of unreasonable and intemperate demands, rules and regulations. I would tear up her picture – if I had one – because even the most exhaustive search of The Internet fails to unearth much information about this horrible harridan who has fallen so far in my affections. Just to prove that I’m not an unreasonable man, let me take you through a list of Blancher’s instructions. Under the chapter “General Habits” she writes: Don’t sit down to breakfast in your shirtsleeves in hot weather on the ground that “only your wife” is present”. “Don’t flourish a grimy handkerchief about because you have forgotten to take a clean one out of your box or your drawer”. Don’t stoop, even if your work is deskwork. Your wife wants to see you straight and broad chested”. “Don’t slouch, no one who cares for a man likes to see him acquire a slouching habit”. It gets worse. Blanche exhorts: “Don’t fidget. Some husbands are never still for a moment. They walk in and out of rooms like the wandering Jew; they play with the salt at dinner; they draw lines on the tablecloth with a fork; they tap the table with their fingers and the floor with their feet; they creak their slippers and drop the coal tongs on to the tiled hearth. In fact, they keep their wives in a state of tension and the poor creatures would need nerves of iron to enable them to stand the strain”. Not content to leave it at that she continues: “Don’t sharpen pencils all over the house as you walk about. Try a hearth or a waste paper basket or a newspaper. It does not improve either carpets or the servants’ temper to find scraps of pencil-sharpenings all over the floors”. On the subject of jealousy, Blanche has this to say: “ Don’t object to a servant on the score of her looks. Your wife will take care not to engage a pretty maid if she suspects you of undue interest in her appearance”. Or what about: “Don’t object to your wife going out with another man if you can’t take her yourself – so long as you know and approve of the man”. Or, “Don’t, if you think your wife sees to much of another man, forbid her to speak to him. You will perhaps only crystallize a wandering fancy by this method. Fill up her time yourself; take her out a good deal, and the too friendly attitude will soon die a natural death”. When it comes to household matters, she writes: “Don’t interfere with your wife’s household management. Nothing upsets servants more than interference in matters of detail from the master of the house”. “Don’t sneer at your wife’s cookery or bridge playing or singing, or in fact, at anything that she does”. “Don’t make up your mind to a mother-in-law difficulty. If you take her the right way, you will probably find your mother-in-law not only a charming woman but one of hour best friends”. “Don’t domineer over the servants”, she continues. “Unwilling service is never good, and a kind word or a pleasant smile will do wonders in the way of saving your wife from being harassed”. “Don’t be afraid of lending a hand in the house during a temporary servant difficulty, or if you keep no servant. It will do you no harm at all to learn how to light a fire or clean a pair of boots”. When it comes to recreation and holidays, this woman is really off the wall. She writes: “Don’t think that you have of necessity done with walking or cycling tours now you are married, as you can’t leave your wife and go away with your old chum. Why not take her? If you will moderate your ardour, and be content to walk fifteen miles a day instead of twenty and to carry a slightly larger knapsack (you’ll never feel the difference), you and your wife can have the most delightful walking tours together. Or if she cycles, and you will think less of the miles you cover than the charming villages you investigate, you will not need a better chum than she can be”. “Don’t say it is no fun to go out cycling with your wife because she can’t ‘scorch’. It will do you no harm to ride more slowly than usual and your company will give her a great deal of pleasure. Her going slow is one of the secrets of her chances of longer life. Take her with you, and you will avoid that overtaxing of the arteries which leads to premature old age”. Blanche was obviously not too fond of music. In the chapter concerning hobbies she urges: “Don’t if music be your hobby, practice the violin, cello, flute, trombone or whatever musical instrument you happen to fancy, in the drawing room for many hours a day. Your wife may also be fond of music, and it is not fair to victimize her to this extent. She won’t be able to concentrate on a book while her ear is tortured by false notes”. Later she says: “Don’t forget to use a reasonable amount of caution should your hobby be one that may be dangerous. Your wife has a right to expect you not to take undue risks in your motor-car, bicycle, or flying machine”. I could go on and on, but I won’t and I have to confess that I rue the day I first came across the collected works of Blanche Ebbutt, first published in 1913, and now republished by A. &C. Black, Ltd, London, and available to the unwary or downright foolish at any good bookshop. Wednesday, July 23rd. 2008 French leader won't twist our arms on Lisbon Sources close to the top tell me that the Taoiseach, Brian Cowan was extremely blunt when he told the French President Nicolas Sarkozy to stop interfering in Irish politics by demanding that we hold a second referendum on the Lisbon Treaty. The government is taking a tough stance because it fears that any further interference by the French president will only serve to swell the ranks of the “No” voters and make the situation even worse.
It has to be said that the arrogance of the French president is somewhat breathtaking. He seems to be of the opinion that a flying visit of a few hours is more than sufficient to persuade the Irish people to change their minds on Lisbon. Nothing could be further from the truth, in fact it could be said that the opposition to Lisbon is even stronger now than on polling day.
People resent such a naked attempt to subvert our sovereignty and democracy because that is exactly what the French President is attempting to do. He has been less than diplomatic in his utterances since he achieved the EU presidency and has served to make a bad situation worse.
I have no doubt that the problems surrounding Lisbon can be fixed in time. However, the Irish voters in their own way will resolve it and we do not need an arrogant Frenchman with a flashy wife delivering lectures on our civic responsibilities. Replay win will be divine Dear Lord in Heaven, You will agree that I don’t bother you much these days, but I’m afraid that these are exceptional circumstances and I have no alternative but to seek your divine intervention. Would it be at all possible that you might arrange for Fermanagh to win the Ulster Final replay in Clones this weekend? If so, you would be doing me and all belonging to me a great favour.
As I was walking up Fermanagh Street towards the Diamond in Clones on Sunday last, I thought I saw my older brother in the distance. He vanished before I could catch up with him but it made little difference because every Fermanagh man was a brother as we made our way towards destiny and the meeting with Armagh. Hopes were high that we might just manage to do it this time having waited all of 26 years for a place in the final.
Now Lord I have absolutely no hostility or ill feelings when it comes to Armagh and its people, but it has to be said that the Orchard County has seemed to win all before them when it comes to football. They were very low key as they turned up in Clones – it appeared to me that they thought all they had to do was turn up and collect the cup.
Is it too much to ask Lord for just one taste of Fermanagh victory before I die? After all I have been around for over sixty years and feel that I have waited long enough. Is it unreasonable to ask for a tiny bit of divine intervention that would result in my knowing what it is like to support a winning side? It seems terribly unjust that my poor county in common with Wicklow has never managed to win anything throughout the history of Gaelic football.
Now I have absolutely no intention of boring you Lord with the fine details of the game except to say that the first half comprised some of the worst football I have ever witnessed in my life. It was slow, it was turgid, it was defensive and it was downright awful to watch. Massed defensive play and squandered opportunities abounded and before long the old familiar sinking feeling had set in. Things were looking bad at half time and the prospects of any improvement seemed very dim indeed.
But it was a game of two halves Lord. Fermanagh changed tactics and began a spirited fight back that resulted in a heart stopping final few minutes. The Armagh lads looked bewildered and shell-shocked and were damn lucky to hold on. It was truly a memorable final five minutes or so.
But Lord, if you do decide to come to my aid this weekend and work a miracle or two, perhaps you might devote some thought as to how to solve the problems caused by a lack of free takers. You might also direct your thoughts as to how to solve the problems that arise from squandered chances right in front of goal. We have one last chance at getting it right and the time will never be better than now.
There is a special significance about next weekend Lord. The entire family will be gathering in the heart of the Donegal Gaeltacht where one of my favourite nephews is to marry a local beauty. Should You be good enough to help up out you would be making three elderly grey haired bearded man very happy indeed as we could kill two birds with one stone, so to speak, and suitably celebrate a truly historic occasion.
This is our All Ireland, Lord. Should You put your shoulder to the wheel I promise that I will never bother you again in the cause of Fermanagh football. Just one Ulster final would be enough to keep me happy for the rest of my days having learned – for once – what it is like to cheer my county to a long awaited and much deserved victory. Please heed the prayer of an old sinner and allow Fermanagh to do unto others what others have been doing unto us for years and years and years. Drivers getting the message The news that the number of motorists arrested for drink driving has almost halved in the space of just two years is very welcome indeed. According to senior Garda officers, the statistics indicate a significant culture change in the drink driving habits of motorists here.
I was surprised to learn that the Irish result compares
favourably with the outcome of checks in other European countries.
We act more responsibly than either the British or the Swiss, which
I found a bit surprising. It makes a pleasant change to hear a bit
of good news.
Wednesday, July 9th. 2008 Invisible man can't hide from victims of crime I have the dubious privilege of living in a constituency that is represented in the Dail by The Invisible Man. I call him The Invisible Man because, apart from one doorstep visit at times of a General Election, he then completely disappears from view and is not seen again until the next time my vote is needed.
The Invisible Man is none other than Fianna Fail Kerry North TD, Tom McEllistrim. Now in the course of this job I find myself attending more than my fair share of social events and normally would expect to bump into him on an occasional basis. But sadly, this is not the case. Once the votes are cast it’s a case of Nada.
But it would appear that The Invisible Man has not been idle despite his absence from the local scene. Documents obtained under the Freedom of Information Act published last week show that he has been the country’s most prolific lobbyist seeking special treatment on behalf of prisoners. In fact, The Invisible Man made six separate representations in 2006 and early 2007 on behalf of prisoners convicted of murder, drug dealing, drink driving and serious harm.
He unsuccessfully sought gradual day release for a drug dealer who was serving an eight-year sentence in Limerick Prison. He also unsuccessfully sought the relaxation of supervision conditions for a man who had been released after serving a life sentence for murder.
Needless to say victims of crime and those who champion their plight have greeted this news with a wave of anger. It is not in the least bit surprising that victims feel that their needs are being ignored at the expense of convicted criminals. I’m inclined to agree with them.
North Kerry has been a sorely politically neglected part of the country and we experience more than our fair share of problems and deprivation. Now it would appear to me that The Invisible Man would be much better occupied concerning himself with addressing local problems than concerning himself with the concerns of murderers, drug dealers and drunk drivers. Surely that it not unreasonable?
Of course he is not alone. Many TD’s and senators have sought special treatment for dozens of prisoners convicted of serious crimes including a request in aid of the killers of Detective Garda Jerry McCabe. In fact, more than 50 representations were made to the Department of Justice by some of the most senior politicians including former Taoiseach, Bertie Ahern and current cabinet ministers, Brian Lenihan, Dermot Ahern, Willie O’Dea and Eamon O’Cuiv.
I think that most reasonable people would agree that those convicted of such crimes as murder, drug dealing, drunk driving and serious assault more or less deserve what they get. In fact there is a feeling abroad that our sentencing policy is far too lenient in many cases and that the prison system is failing society in general. Serious overcrowding of our prisons mean that many offenders serve only a small portion of their sentences and are allowed back out onto the street with inappropriate haste.
This leads to undoubted anger, particularly among those who have been victims of violence. It would appear that once the court proceedings are done and dusted that the victims are left to their own devices and must pick up the pieces with little or no help from anybody. It seems grossly unfair that the plight of victims is largely ignored while the welfare of those who carried out the crimes gets a higher place on the totem pole.
The Invisible Man would be well advised to remember that there are elections looming in the not too distant future and that people have long memories. Those memories are further lengthened as the recession begins to bite and the good old days become a thing of the past. There might yet be a considerable price to be paid by The Invisible Man and his political colleagues.
Should The Invisible Man decide to widen his base of concern I would be more than delighted to meet up with him and show him a few things he should be concerned about. I would be more than prepared to brief him on the plight of our local health service, increasing unemployment, ramshackle infrastructure and a whole host of major social problems involving the old, the sick, the helpless and those who have nobody to speak for them.
Should The Invisible Man decide to materialize into
plain sight, I would be delighted to clap eyes on him. We have a considerable
amount of things to talk about The show ain't over yet I met a Corkman in a very sorry state in my local supermarket early on Monday morning. His physical condition was as a result of celebrating the Rebel victory over the Kingdom in the Munster final. Needless to say he was cock-a-hoop and was looking forward to his team going all the way this year.
I would advise caution. There is nothing shameful about the back door and the Kingdom has been there before with a vengeance. Also I think that it is true to say that the Kerry team is now akin to a very dangerously wounded animal and God help any team that comes up against them in the qualifiers.
There is many a slip, as they say, and I think that Sunday’s defeat represents little more than a wake up call. Like they say, the show isn’t over until the fat lady sings. Car-running costs going into overdrive Recently published figures show that the yearly cost of running a family car is €526 more now than it was a year ago. Soaring petrol prices have pushed up the expense of keeping a car on the road by almost five per cent in twelve months That is a staggering figure. The figures show that the cost of running the average petrol-driven family car is €12,236 a year and this includes the cost of fuel, servicing and repairs, paying off purchase loans and depreciation in a car’s value. The figures were complied by the Automobile Association, which calculated a car using 30 miles to the gallon, which covered 1,600 kilometers a year, would use 1,500 liters of fuel. A year ago this would have cost €1,759, but today costs €1,957 – a rise of 11%. For the 18% of motorists with a diesel car, the fuel costs were even greater having risen 30% from €1,627 to €2,143. I think that its time to dig the bike out of the garden
shed and pump the tyres
Wednesday, July 2nd 2008 From boom to bust,and no one shouted stop It’s official! According to the ESRI and the
European Central Bank the Celtic Tiger is officially dead and buried
and the only thing left to do is to erect the headstone and carry
out the post mortem. Plan hangs on higher powers The story goes that in the year 2008, the Lord came
unto Noah who was now living in West Kerry and said: ‘Once again
the earth has become wicked and over-populated and I see the end of
all flesh before me. Build another Ark and save two of every living
thing along with a few good humans’ The Lord then gave Noah
the blueprints saying:’ you have six months to build the Ark
before I will start the unending raid for forty days and forty nights’.
Wednesday, June 25th. 2008 Twice the fun as underdogs arise and conquer... It has been a good week or two. It would seem that fate had decreed that I end up on the losing side of most of the political arguments in Ireland, but this past week or so has been an exception. Not only was the Lisbon Referendum Treaty voted down but, on the sporting front comes the joyous news that my beloved Co. Fermanagh has managed to reach an Ulster Final for the first time in 26 years. But first to Lisbon! I have to admit that a large measure of my delight in the result lies in the fact that the electorate has at long last managed to deliver a well-deserved kick up the backsides of our politicians. These well -clad backsides have long deserved this sort of treatment belonging, as they do, to the arrogant brotherhood that largely want nothing at all to do with those who vote them into power. It is true to say that politicians have little or no time for the electorate except for those times when elections loom. As soon as the elections are over they retreat back into the corridors of power and resume their normal lives. Well, to my mind, Lisbon was an excellent opportunity to show them who are the bosses and deliver a swift and stark reminder of their vulnerability. The political landscape has resembled Flanders’s Field ever since the referendum result was announced. There is a totally unjustified air of panic and despair as the great European experiment was not so much derailed as forced to make an unscheduled stop. Needless to say there is a lot of nonsense being talked and I fear deliberate attempts are being mounted to spread panic about our collective future. All the politicians were quick to assert that despite the result, Ireland was still very strongly pro-European and wished to remain at the very heart of Europe. They have said that Europe has been very good for this country and that this has shaped our desire to remain firmly in the fold. Somehow, I don’t think that this argument is as valid nowadays as it was some years ago. We should not forget that we did not come empty handed to the European table. The first thing we did on joining the club was to hand over our £500 billion fishing industry as the price of membership. We were persuaded to do this because of the benefits that would result to the agricultural sector and were finally convinced that our membership would result in a true common market where all goods and services would be available at the same price all across Europe. We all know how that turned out. It seems a total mockery that we are paying up to 40% higher prices for goods and services than people in the North of Ireland just a hundred miles or so up the road. We are being mercilessly ripped off at every turn at a time when the economy is going into a nosedive that promises grim repercussions. One is entitled to wonder if the price paid for the Pharonic orgy of construction is justified when the health services are in a shambles and the old and sick lie on hospital trollies awaiting beds in unhygienic hospitals and sub standard nursing homes. Don’t for a minute believe all these claims that the Treaty cannot be renegotiated and that we will be left out in the cold. That is all hogwash and scare tactics! The truth is that any good trade union shop steward could, within half an hour or so, come up with a perfectly acceptable formula written on the back of an envelope that would solve all the problems. It could be called anything the politician’s desire. It could be an opt out, a declaration, a protocol, a statement of position - it matters little what title is put on it so long as it addresses the objections of the Irish voters. It could then be put before the electorate and it would be business as usual. That is the sort of thing we elect politicians to do and they had best get on with it. A careful study of the present situation would appear to suggest that very little needs to be done to ensure that the whole European bandwagon continues to roll along on its merry way. Some experts I have spoken to appear to suggest that there is absolutely no need why Ireland or any other country should loose a commissioner. They suggest that the status quo could continue quite happily and that it would make little or no difference in the long run. They have also suggested that things could continue in much the same way as at present and that the workings of the major European bodies would be largely unaffected. Any attempt to frighten Irish voters into overturning their decision would be akin to taking a sledgehammer to crack a nut and could prove counter productive in the entire scheme of things. It has to be said that witnessing the newly appointed Minister for Finance, Brian Lenihan whining and whinging to a group of builders about having the misfortune to be appointed Minister at a time when the building industry was “coming to a shuddering halt” does little to inspire confidence. Get on with it Minister! Any fool can do well when the economy is booming. You now have a chance to prove whether or not you are worthy of your electorate. But enough of that! Needless to say I’m making plans at the moment to head up to the Ulster Final in the hope that Fermanagh will finally manage to capture the title. It is a sad thing to have never managed to win a provincial title and few have any conception of what it would mean to the people of my native county. It has to be said that I’m not counting my chickens before they are hatched because there is another fairly daunting hurdle to overcome. But I’m buoyed up by the fact that events of the past few weeks have proved that sometimes underdogs get their day in the sun and can prevail against overwhelming odds. If the Irish can stand up to the might of Europe and win a victory, then there is hope for Fermanagh in the days ahead. Perhaps a well-directed novena would be in order. I’m game to give anything a try. Wednesday, June 18th. 2008Ladies, you owe it to your husbands My friend Brenda owns and runs an establishment that is not so much a bookshop as a shrine to the written word right in the center of the beating heart of the town of Listowel - a place rightfully regarded as the literary capital of Ireland. It was there on Friday afternoon last that I fell madly, deeply, irredeemably and helplessly in love. Somewhere between “Modern Irish Writers”, “This Week’s Bestsellers” and “Fantasy and Fiction” I gave my heart to my new love, a certain Blanche Ebbutt , a woman of such wonderful attributes that I found myself lost forever. Rarely has such a woman graced the face of the earth and rarely indeed has a woman been born who really knows about husbands, their needs and their wants. For it was she, my beloved Blanche, who authored the book, “Don’ts for Wives”, which was published in 1913 and which is, to my mind, a work of such monumental importance that not only should it win the Nobel Prize for Literature but should also be immediately placed in the hands of every female to be intensively studied from infancy to death. In a world of rapidly declining standards, Blanche’s undoubted wisdom and understanding mocks the passage of time. I would go even further! Older readers will remember a time back in the sixties when we all felt underdressed if we did not have at least once copy of “Mao’s Little Red Book” on our person as we made our way to the latest demonstration. Let it be known that Blanche’s “Don’ts For Wives” is a slim little volume that will easily slip into any handbag or even the hip pocket of skintight jeans. This makes it perfect for intensive study during idle moments and that study will undoubtedly make our world a much kinder place to be for future generations.
But even those words pale to insignificance when compared with Blanche’s advice:” Don’t brood; that way madness lies. Don’t hesitate, if you catch yourself brooding to ‘take a day off’ in the best way you can. Go out and gossip with your friend; get to a theatre where there is a play that will make you laugh; or try a concert or a cinema show - anything that will take you out of yourself. Take the brooding habit in time before it gets too strong a hold of you”. Blanche, I love you dearly and that love is intensified as I read you write: “Don’t stop at that. Half the brooding and half the ill humor in the world are due to foolish feeding. The woman who broods probably does not trouble about the meals when her husband is away - doesn’t have a decent repast at midday, but some bread and butter, or pastries and a cup of tea; or perhaps she eats too much meat. Three, or even two, meat meals a day tend to make the world look very black to the middle aged. The ever-flowing teapot is as bad”. So wise is my beloved Blanche that in the chapter headed “How to Avoid Discord” she writes: “Don’t attempt to dictate to your husband on any subject. He won’t stand for it and there will be trouble”. When it comes to habits she advises: “Don’t grudge your husband his little luxuries - his cigarette, or his pipes or his books. Who has a better right to them than the man who earns them”? It gets even better. Blanche continues: “Don’t hesitate to inconvenience yourself to give him a den all his own. He’s really a good fellow, and a lot of his worries will melt away if he has a place to himself for a while. When he is out, the den will be yours”. Mind you, it has to be said that I’m less impressed with her advice: “Don’t let your husband sharpen lead pencils all over the drawing-room carpet. He will be none the happier for it and the carpet will suffer as well as the maid’s temper”. However, it has to be said that she more than redeems herself when she says: “Don’t think it beneath you to put your husband’s slippers ready for him. On a cold evening, especially, it makes all the difference to his comfort if the soles are warmed through”. My admiration is boundless when it comes to the chapter “Evenings At Home”. Here Blanche counsels: “Don’t bother you’re husband with a stream of senseless chatter if you can see that he is very fatigued. Help him to the tit-bits at dinner, modulate your voice; don’t’ remark on his silence. If you have any cheery little anecdote to relate, tell it with quiet humour and, by and by, he will respond. But if you tackle him in the wrong way, the two of you will spend a miserable evening”. On the subject of Jealousy, Blanche is explicit. “Don’t try too hard to regulate your husband’s pleasures and don’t be jealous if they don’t always include you”. When it comes to Recreation, Blanche says: “Don’t be afraid to rough it now and again with your husband as a companion. If he feels that he would like a week’s walking tour with you as a chum, don’t object that it may rain, or that you haven’t a suitable dress, or that you can’t manage for a week with nothing in the way of luggage except a nightdress and a toothbrush. Enter into the spirit of the thing, and you’ll get quite as much fun out of it as he will, and be happier than if he accompanied you to some fashionable resort where you would need to dress three or four times a day”. Perhaps most important of all is her admonition: “Don’t forget to feed the brute well. Much depends on the state of his digestion”, or the wise words: “Don’t buy expensive food, and have it ruined in the cooking. If your cook isn’t up to French dishes, be satisfied with English ones cooked to perfection”. Or what about:” Don’t think anything too much trouble to do for your husband’s comfort; remember he is occupied all day in working for you. Don’t be afraid of thinking and planning and working for him”. I have to admit I’m deeply touched by the advice: “Don’t let your servants use paraffin oil for fire-lighting purposes, nor leave a newspaper fastened up in front of the fireplace to draw up the fire”. The maxim: “Don’t omit to learn how to put on a bandage. You will be very lucky if you get through your married life without having to do it for some member of the family, and the right way is so much better than the wrong one”. How true. Blanche’s final words of advice are: “Don’t grudge the years you spend on child-bearing and child-rearing. Remember you are training future citizens, and it is the most important mission in the world”. Well said my beloved Blanche and I can assure you that my most important mission in the world is to ensure that your words of wisdom are immediately placed in the hands of every infant and elderly female in the country. If the Referendum Commission can do it, why not I? As a start let me tell you that “Don’ts For Wives” is published by A &C Black of London and can be found in all good bookshops, including Brenda’s. Top Treaty research leaves me baffled I will be voting No in this week’s Lisbon Treaty referendum largely on the basis that only a fool would vote to accept something that he or she does not understand. God knows I have tried to get a handle on the issues involved, but despite my best efforts I remain confused on many of the major issues. Saga sees bertie humbled further I don't know about you but I have to admit to feeling a bit sorry for former Taoiseach, Bertie Ahern as he daily turns himself into a figure of national ridicule before the Mahon Tribunal. By the end of the second day of his latest evidence, he had them rolling in the aisles with his unlikely tales of betting on horses in England in an effort to explain previously undiscovered sterling lodgments. Growth in small arms figures There are at least 150,000 illegally held unlicensed firearms in this country according to the most recent Small Arms Survey that was published last week but went largely unnoticed. Gardai say that of greatest concern are the weapons in the hands of criminal gangs, many of which are semi-automatic pistols and submachine guns that have fuelled unprecedented murderous rivalries among drug gangs.
Wednesday, May 28th. 2008 Use of patriots is a treaty low Could it be possible that I’m the only one who finds the cynical use of the memory of our patriot dead by some of those opposed to the Lisbon Referendum as grossly offensive? This is the cheapest of cheap shots and is an insult to the memory of those who are rightfully honoured and revered. Whoever dreamed up this poster campaign should be thoroughly ashamed of themselves. I confess that when I first saw these posters I was greatly angered at the cynicism and dishonesty they represented and felt that the reaction they produced was most likely to be counter productive. This was an appalling political blunder by any standards. Those who died for our country were driven by motives such a freedom, justice and liberty. They were engaged in a life and death struggle against an oppressor intent on denying us our independence. To seek to drag them into this present argument is an insult not only to their memory but also to the intelligence of the electorate that will be going to the polls in the next few weeks. I have absolutely no idea how Tone or Connolly or any of their brotherhood would have reacted to the problems and issues raised in the upcoming Referendum. These were people who were consumed by such issues as rights and freedoms and equal opportunity for all. Who knows how they would have reacted to a complex political question that also involves rights, freedoms and equal opportunities for those in the less well off regions of the expanded Europe of the new century. However it is a fair bet to say that they would be outraged that their memory and their sacrifice would be cynically and shamefully manipulated to reduce this most complex of arguments to a level which depends on sectarianism and nationalistic bigotry. That was not what they died for and is perhaps, something that they would have bitterly opposed. Commissioner Charlie McCreevey in an interview the other day said that he had not read the entire Treaty and that it was opinion that no sane person had done so. He compared the political battle to the clash between the footballers of Wicklow and Kildare and said that, during that particular encounter, the best team won. It was his view that the political argument should continue in the same way and he hoped that the best team would win out in the end. To my mind the best team is the one which will rely on common sense and reasoned argument rather than one which stoops to attempting to drag us all back to dark memories of bitter violent days of life and death struggles. That day is thankfully long gone and should remain in the historical past. To attempt to exhume those dark days and weave them into the present argument is an insult to us all. I’m still undecided as to how I will vote. I’m reading all the arguments and trying to come to a reasoned decision. However it turns out, that decision will certainly not be arrived at by any argument that attempts to prey on old hostilities and injustices, sectarianism and oppression. These are different days, different arguments, different issues and different political horizons. Shame on those who attempt to reawaken our troubled past and attempt to sail to victory by hoisting their sales in a reawakened waft of old Fenian winding-sheets! It is an insult to us all.
Cowen should watch his words Our new Taoiseach had not been in the job for a wet week when he became embroiled in what is now being referred to as the “effing” controversy. In an unguarded moment during Question Time he used the “F” word unaware of the fact that his comments were being picked up by a microphone on the desk before him. As a result we were all unaware as to whether the expletive was directed at Fine Gael, the Labour Party or at civil servants. Fine Gael was quick to take offence and accused Biffo of using unparliamentary language. The Labour Party was equally nonplussed and demanded a withdrawal. Confusion reigned compounded by the fact that the exchange had not been recorded on the Dail record. RTE experts were called in and listened to the tape and it was soon established that the words had been directed at unnamed civil servants. So we are left with the conclusion that while Fine Gael are not F*****s, and the Labour Party are not F*****s, civil servants are. It appears to me that the Taoiseach is embarking on dangerous ground. Leaders may come and go and ministers may come and go, but the civil service seems to go on forever. These are the people who carry out government orders and who smooth the path. To describe these most important people as F*****s is, to my mind, a very foolish act and is akin to taking your life in your hands. He may yet live to rue the day! We shouldn't cough up for contest turkey Yet once again we have learned that it is not a good idea to send a turkey to represent us in the Eurovision Song Contest. You would have thought that we would have learned by now. Those responsible for the latest debacle are keeping their heads well down while trying to hide their blushes of embarrassment. Frankly, I don’t give a damn about Eurovision except for the fact that a very large amount of license payer’s money was spent on this disastrously embarrassing junket. It would appear that those who are in charge of such things have failed to grasp the fact that music is one of the things we are particularly good at in this country. Those responsible for this year’s effort should in decency dig deep into their own pockets and refund their airline fares and hotel bills as a gesture of contrition to all of us who have to suffer the results of their inanities. Enough said! Husband didn't bet on close call A man was sitting quietly reading his paper when his wife walked up behind him and whacked him on the head with a magazine. 'What was that for?' he asked. 'That was for the piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name Laura Lou written on it,' she replied. 'Two weeks ago when I went to the races, Laura Lou was the name of one of the horses I bet on,' he explained. 'Oh honey, I'm sorry,' she said. 'I should have known there was a good explanation.' Three days later he was watching a soccer game on TV when she walked up and hit him in the head again, this time with the frying pan that knocked him out cold. When he came to, he asked, 'What the hell was that for?' 'Your horse called.' She replied. Wednesday, May 21st. 2008 Nothing friendly as u12s fly off handle It was my efforts to locate a starting handle for a 1965 Morris Minor that brought me into the company of a man known as The Magpie last week. The Magpie got his name because of the fact that he has never thrown anything away, he hordes all manner of possessions and knowledge, and is the first port of call for those embarked on quests similar to that of locating the Holy Grail. I have absolutely no intention of attempting to explain why I needed a Morris Minor starting handle. It is far to complicated a subject to embark on. But anyway, I tracked The Magpie down to a sports field in North Kerry where I found him coaching the local Girl’s Under - 12’s football team which was engaged in what could laughingly be described as a friendly match with rivals from a neighbouring town.
“There’s not doubt about. Breeding is better than feeding”, muttered The Magpie as he began to point out some of the individual tiny female amazons and tell me who they were. In fact, most of the best-known footballing names in that particular part of North Kerry were represented in the ranks of waifs and strays that raged up and down the field, many of them female representatives of extremely fine footballing pedigrees. He pointed out one small chubby cheeked girl with red hair who was playing in the full back position. “One of the great things about working with kids and with girls in particular is that they do everything you tell them”, he said. “When she started playing I told her to hold onto the ball and get it up the field at all costs, and that is exactly what she will do or die in the attempt”. Sure enough, a few minutes later a feebly kicked ball fell into her waiting arms. She immediately clutched it to her bosom and began trotting up the field displaying all the determination of an Irish international rugby player. Sadly, she was dragged down by one of her own teammates who seemed impatient at the break in the flow of play. A row broke out and eventually she was awarded a free. She trotted back a few paces and then hoofed the ball up the field where it fell into the path of an incoming full forward. “Watch this”, said The Magpie as the drama began to unfold. “She is the daughter of one of the best regarded footballers in this town, but just like him, she hates to get hit. She won’t hang onto the ball any longer than she has to”. Sure enough, as a group of defenders closed on her she emitted a loud scream and booted the ball in the general direction of the goalmouth. There it was intercepted by one of her teammates who through some miracle of good fortune and mischance managed to inflict a crippling and disabling blow to the last remaining defender and directed the ball into the back of the net. Admittedly her task was made somewhat easier by the fact that the goalie was displaying gross dereliction of duty at this crucial moment as she was leaning against one of the goalposts and talking into a mobile phone. Incensed by having her conversation so rudely interrupted she launched a savage attack on the victorious forward resulting in a goalmouth melee which would do credit to Meathmen in the final moments of an all-Ireland final. However the ultimate proof that the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree came from the tiny granddaughter of one of the footballing greats, a man who featured in the legendry Kerry finals of the 1970’s. This man was an extremely talented forward whose only flaw was the fact that he was cursed with an unpredictable temper of volcanic proportions. The granddaughter has it in spades. Now fair enough, it has to be admitted that being wrestled to the ground by two defenders who are clinging onto your pigtails represents an unacceptable degree of provocation. She picked herself up, wiped away a tear or two and then proceeded to launch a full frontal physical assault on her tormenters which was mercifully halted by a hard pressed referee before the ambulance had to be sent for. The game was eventually declared a draw and minutes later the warring parties emerged from the dressing room swathed in duffle coats and padded jackets representing all that is best in sugar and spice and all things nice. Their waiting parents packed them into SUV’s and ferried the “butter wouldn’t melt in their mouth brigade” off into the night. Much later The Magpie, myself and the Morris Minor starting handle were to be found drinking a much-needed pint or two in John B’s. We agreed that Mother Ireland was breeding them yet and that it certainly was true that breeding was better than feeding. I made my way home contemplating the possibility of passing on the starting handle to the pigtailed granddaughter of the legendry footballer. I have a feeling that she will need it as a method of self-defence if she is to continue in the family football tradition and hopes to reach her teenage years. Disaster highlights a merciless power The harrowing television footage emerging from the earthquake in China and the typhoon in Burma is a sobering reminder of the fragility of human life in the more vulnerable areas of our planet. The scenes of heartbreak and despair as parents watch their dead children being recovered from collapsed buildings are almost too much to bear. But it struck me that those who devote their lives to world peace might pause in their efforts to consider whether or not their concern should be extended to the Military Junta in Burma which must rank at the very top of the league table of human bastardies. These merciless people are so obsessed with holding on to power that they are quite happy to watch their hapless population die in agony rather than risk their position of privilege and power by allowing aid workers into the country. One can only hope and pray that they will get their comeuppance sooner rather than later. A day of serious reckoning beckons in the not too distant future and the international community should do all in its power to speed its arrival. There is no room on the face of the planet for people like this.
Wednesday, May 14th. 2008 Important vote - so do your own research Every time powerful politicians and well heeled businessmen lecture me on how to cast my vote my immediate reaction is to reach for a revolver. It’s happening again now that the Lisbon Referendum Treaty looms and the arguments gather pace. Within the next week or two a booklet compiled by the independent commission, which is charged with providing impartial information to the public on referendum issues will be arriving through your door. Now I have the height of respect for the commission and have found the information it provides to be largely on the ball if somewhat short on detail. This is likely to be the case yet once again. It was my intention this week to give a measured breakdown of the issues involved in the Lisbon Treaty. It is a dirty job, but somebody has got to do it. However, I quickly found out that there is a lot more involved than I had originally thought and that the issues are highly complex and far reaching for all of us. To understand the Treaty ramifications it is necessary to indulge in a hell of a lot of reading involving technical complex issues that it is far too easy to overlook. You will be told by the politicians and the businessmen that the Treaty is really only about housekeeping now that the EU has trebled. They will tell you that a “Yes” vote will result in more transparency and accountability and that our acceptance will put us at the heart of decision making in Europe. They will warn that a “No” vote will send a signal that we are not really committed to the European ideal and that the country will suffer as a result. That basically is the arguments that will be presented. Those who have already declared themselves to be in opposition comprise the usual suspects with a few odd exceptions. The arguments being put forward by the opposing parties all have certain validity but really, the issue is truly a complex one rather than a simple black and white issue. The various arguments only skim the surface of a truly labyrinthine political decision that could affect our lives for years to come. I’m not going to urge anybody to vote one way or another because I’m still somewhat unclear about the weight to be attached to the opposing viewpoints. However, I have reached the conclusion that if I were a farmer I would be very anxious that the various leaders of the farming organizations would become a lot more involved in the discussions and give a bit of leadership. We are facing a fairly difficult economic future and the significance of ratification of this Treaty could perhaps be the most important thing we will do for years. I have still to make up my mind and will be reading up on the subject in the week to come. It would be a good idea for those who are concerned about the issues and the validity of the various arguments to embark on a similar course of action. The pressure for a “Yes” vote will be unrelenting, as the new Taoiseach has staked his personal reputation on a win. The “No” camp has failed to coalesce on a coherent strategy and the recent political turmoil in Fianna Fail has led to a postponing of this very important debate resulting in an unfortunately late start. It is an important issue and it is important that everybody cast his or her vote. What happens on Referendum day will have reverberations that will continue for many years to come. Communicants dressed as adults "a step too far" It was First Holy Communion Day in my town last week and once again small female children dressed up in a grotesque parody of tiny harlots infested the place. Have parents totally lost their minds to such a degree that they find it appropriate to sexualize their infant children to such a horrific and inappropriate degree? Not all parents are guilty but a disturbingly large number are! I found it very troubling to contemplate the mindset of those who have no hesitation in dressing up their children in such a way as to resemble something that is a cross between miniature beauty queens and streetwalkers. Has all sense and reason gone out the window. These are dangerous times for children. Those parents who seek to sexualize their children at such a tender age do so at their peril. Every year it seems to get worse and worse and now First Communion Days are transformed into a grotesque caricature of all that is worst in our celebrity driven world. I’m not a religious man and have never claimed to be. However, I have to say that it must be very difficult for the clergy who officiate at the Sacrament of First Holy Communion to have to stomach the sight of some of the children who appear at the altar rails for the first time. To my mind, this totally inappropriate behavior makes a mockery of the whole ceremony. Perhaps I’m getting old and out of touch, but I was truly horrified the other day at what I had witnessed. My only crumb of comfort came from the fact that a number of people I talked to later in the day expressed similar opinions Dispute impacts on those most at risk Surely there can be no more difficult or dangerous job in the world than that of a psychiatric nurse. At present the psychiatric services are grinding to a halt as the HSE continues on its merry incompetent way that has resulted in the current industrial dispute. One despairs for the health services as a result of the actions of the HSE. We have now reached a state where people are afraid to go into hospital even if a bed were available. Gross mismanagement has resulted in total chaos with hard- pressed, undermanned frontline staff struggling to cope in appalling conditions. This cannot continue for much longer. The psychiatrically ill represent one of the most vulnerable sections of our society. Their needs are immediate and specific. It is a criminal act not to provide the nurses with adequate pay and compensation for injuries and thereby force them into an unnecessary industrial dispute that directly impacts on those who are least able to help themselves. Fix this dispute now! It would not cost a fortune and would serve to show that some justice and compassion still exists in this unfortunate country of ours. Wednesday, May 7th. 2008 Ahern's talk of"huddled masses" wide of the mark Journalistic objectivity and good manners demand that I pay tribute to Bertie Ahern on the quality and appropriateness of his farewell speech to the combined Houses of the American Congress. It was a dignified and emotional speech that pressed all the right buttons and was a fitting farewell by any standards. Having said that I must confess that I felt that he was a bit inclined to over egg the cake when quoted the immortal line "send me your Huddled Masses" and attempted to favorably compare the Irish experience with that of America. For me, at least, this was just going a little too far on that particular subject. For truth to tell we are not good at Huddled Masses nowadays. In fact, we don't do Huddled Masses probably because we have been there, did that and got the tee shirt. We were once good at Huddled Masses, but perhaps because of that experience we now adopt the "once bitten, twice shy" frame of mind. Our finest hour when it came to coping with the Huddled Masses was away back in the Penal Days. Back then when clergy had a price on their sainted heads, people would slink from their beds under cover or darkness and creep through the countryside to gather at the mass rocks or in the shelter of blackthorn bushes in dark desolate places to celebrate Mass. Our rebellious nature meant that we were avid supporters of Huddled Masses and every Penal Mass was guaranteed a full house, so to speak. It could be argued that it was because of these potentially fatal escapades that the practice of spiriting fugitive priests away from the gaze of the authorities became the norm. Every major town and city had at least one or two houses that boasted a "Priest's Hole" where safety was guaranteed until the hue and cry died down. Sadly, it could be said that this practice has existed up until very recent times, but I suppose, it is firmly written into our cultural DNA. But now that we are faced with the modern dilemma of confronting the problems raised by the Huddled Masses, we are falling far short of the mark. We don't do Huddled Masses anymore. Unlike America in the olden days, we are more inclined to bar the door than spread open our arms in welcome. Huddled Masses, it would appear are unwelcome here and we don't want to have anything to do with them. Our Huddled Masses, having managed to survive the coffin ships found jobs and work in the New World. It is true that they were horrendously exploited - mostly by other Irish people - and were robbed blind as the built the cities, the railways, dug the drains and fought the wars. But at least they were given a chance to escape from the harrowing chains of poverty and rebuild lives shattered by the Great Famine. For our HuddledMasses the only way was upwards towards a better life for themselves and their children. The Huddled Masses that flocked to these shores at present comprises 96 different nationalities being catered for in accommodation centers in 22 counties. The adults among the 6,850 asylum seekers receive a weekly allowance of €19.10 and children receive €9.60 along with full bed and board of indifferent quality. They are denied work, denied hope, denied proper help, health and education, and exist in a Celtic Limbo that does us all little credit and is a sad reflection on our humanity and compassion. How quickly we have forgotten the lessons so dearly learned through our own Diaspora. That reservation aside, the outgoing Taoiseach did us proud with his farewell American performance. Let us hope that the Ireland he leaves in his wake will not descend yet once again into a nuclear economic winter when - yet once again - we will be forced to contemplate to yet once again the formations of Huddled Masses at our airports and ferry terminals.
Israeli bosses have not learned from the past The spectacle of the leaders of Ireland's four main Christian Churches being prevented from praying for peace at the Western Wall in Jerusalem on Holocaust Memorial Day represented a huge embarrassment for the Israeli authorities. The church leaders were not allowed entry because an enraged settler took grave exception to the fact that they were wearing crosses - their customary badge of office. The Israeli government needs all the friends it can get in these troubled times. Its treatment of the Palestinian people has enraged even the most disinterested bystanders and it would appear that the Israeli people have learned the lessons of their own terrible experience far too well. Even sadder is the fact that they seem to have little hesitation in visiting that horror on others. The Holy Land is a very unholy place indeed in this day and age. Back O'Reilly's wish for transparency Some of the most important stories to see the light of day in recent years have been unearthed because of the Freedom of Information Act. These stories have been far ranging and have enormous consequences for modern Irish society and have resulted in major injustices being tackled and redressed. Many of the revelations have resulted from questions from both journalistsand the general public. However, in an attempt to stifle that flow of information, the government decided to impose fees that must accompany applications and this has resulted in a major drop of almost one-third in requests over the past three years. The OECD, the Paris based think tank - has recommended that all fees - normally €150 - should be scrapped and this has been welcomed by our Information Commissioner, Emily O'Reilly. All who feel that accountability and transparency are important issues and that those who control our destinies should not do under the shelter of a bureaucratic cloak should support her.
Wednesday, April 30th. 2008 Crunch didn't come without warning The increasingly fraught state of the economy puts me in mind of the story told about the legendry British actor, WC Fields who had the misfortune to find himself before a bankruptcy court in London barely a year after he had been paid one million dollars for his role in the Hollywood film version of "Oliver Twist". This was back in 1947, a time when one Fields, a man with a great fondness for strong drink and partying, was pilloried by the learned judge who asked him:"Mr. Fields, How in God's name did you manage to spend one million dollars in less than a year? This is totally beyond all comprehension". Fields drew himself up to his full height and proudly replied: "My Lord, ninety nine per-cent of it I spent on That story came to my mind the other day when I opened a brown envelope that came through my letterbox. Despite the fact that my approach to financial matters would be somewhat akin to that practiced by the late Mr. Fields, I was astonished to find there was a bank out there which was extremely anxious that I take out one of their credit cards which would provide me with a startlingly large amount of dosh despite the present economic travails. Anyway, it started me thinking about the difficulties It seems like only yesterday - in fact it was about three years ago - that a small number of commentators and columnists - and I was one of those - who began to express niggling doubts about the way the economy was going and began to sound various notes of caution. It didn't take a genius to come to the conclusion that the housing market was totally out of control and that personal borrowings had reached totally unsustainable levels. Naturally nobody wanted to listen and such views were instantly and angrily The first to reject such views were the Taoiseach and his Minister for Finance. Not only were these views condemned as pessimistic and defeatist but it was also claimed that those who put them forward were - to quote the Taoiseach - "nay Sayers" and pessimists. It was even said that those who were putting forward such views were in some way unpatriotic and seeking to damage the country's profits by even hinting at gloomy daysahead. All of this can be found in the Dail record and in radio andtelevision interviews of the time. How things have changed! The country has tipped over the financial apex and is beginning the long nosedive towards recession. Inflation is running at five per-cent. The housing market has collapsed. Manufacturing industry has sunk to its knees with job losses being announced on a weekly basis. The so-called Social Partners find themselves facing into protracted and bitter negotiations with warnings that pay rises which would match inflation would lead to massive unemployment, all this at a time when food prices are climbing at a startling rate and energy costs have gone throughthe roof. The country is chock a block with palatial unoccupied houses thatnobody can afford to live in. Young couples that were granted 100 per-cent mortgages find their repayments spiraling out of control and face the futurewith dismay and despair. Even worse is the fact that all the indications are that things will get much worse before they even begin to get better. The blame game is in full swing. Those in high places wring their hands and point an accusing finger at the American banking system and the collapse of the mortgage sub prime markets. America has not only sneezed but has gone into chronic paroxysms and the rest of the world quakes. The British banking system is in dire straits as the Exchequer struggles to bail it out and credit has become a thing of the past. There is little or no joy in saying "I told you so" but those who spoke of the writing on the wall have now been totally justified. The jibe of being unpatriotic now rings somewhat hollow as reality bites and there is a new game afoot! But perhaps it is appropriate to consider laying at least some measure of blame at the door of all those who have been partly responsible for leading us into this bottomless financial morass. It could easily be argued that the banks have been the authors of a lot of our misfortune. For the past ten or twelve years all the banking chains have been handing out totally unrealistic sums of money to all who passed through their doors. In their relentless drive for profit, penniless persons like myself were inundated on a weekly basis with offers of credit Now in the cold light of a new day it is quite reasonable to reach the conclusion that these are the people who were truly unpatriotic. They were driven by an obscene greed that overwhelmed all commonsense. Sadly, the crows are coming home to roost in their thousands and the outlook facin all of us is extremely bleak indeed. Those of my generation have been here before and are perhaps moreprepared to weather the storm having got the tee shirt in the past. However, I greatly pity the new generation of youngsters who have never known anything but the gravy train of plenty and thought that the days of wine and roses would never end. They are ill prepared to face what lies ahead as we face into the economic wastelands of recession. The new Taoiseach will have his work cut out in the days ahead. If ever we needed a steady hand on the helm, it is now! He faces a truly horrendous baptism of fire in the months and years to come. Leadership is badly needed and needed now. Let us all wish him well as he embarks on what promises to be an extremely rocky and arduous road towards an uncertain
Faith is best kept grounded The uncertain fate of the Brazilian priest who tied himself to 1,000 helium filled balloons and drifted out over the ocean never to be seen again is a timely warning about the dangers of spiritually uplifting experiences. In fairness, it has to be said that this was the most moronic and lunatic ofenterprises despite the fact that it was in a good cause.One can only say that the man was obviously blessed with a very strong faith as he embarked on this nearer My God to Thee attempt. To date, Wednesday, April 23rd. 2008
Will Cannon put PDs on a roll I’m not saying that the Progressive Democratic Party is dead and gone but it is my gut feeling that it is time to order the shroud. The election of the Party’s new leader the other day passed almost unnoticed and that, as they say, is always a bad sign. I know absolutely nothing about the new PD leader and that is the problem. Nobody knows anything about him. Senator Ciaran Cannon has been a member of the Oireachtas for less than a year and was only recently elected as a county councilor. It says something about the state of the Party that it decided he was the heir apparent rather than Dessie O’Malley’s young wan - at least we all know who she is. But that was not to be and now the extremely fragile political future of the PD’s rests in untried and untested hands. It didn’t help that his victory speech was somewhat of the whining variety and this gave little comfort to those who hoped that the vague possibility existed that the Party could once again triumph and aspire to the High Moral Ground, a place they occupied briefly and unwisely during the height of their political power. Describing the PD’s as a party comprised of “people with the passion, the commitment, the knowledge and the talent to stage a comeback”, Senator Canon said he believed the PD’s had been “unfairly pigeon-holed as an uncaring party” and had failed to properly set out its priorities to the electorate. He said that under his leadership the PD’s would once again be “the champion of all taxpayers who demand better value for their investment in the public service system. “Despite our small numbers, the Progressive Democrats have blazed a trail of reform and innovation for the last 20 years”, he continued. “We have added colour and vigor to what otherwise would have been stale consensus politics”, he added vowing to build a strong and united party from the grassroots up and “to be a fresh, new canvas on which our members and our people can paint their ideas and vision for a better Ireland”. Pigs might fly! The Party now has a total of 3,900 members of which only 40 per-cent bothered to vote. This bodes ill for the future and is a stark illustration of the challenges faced by a new leader who is totally unknown to the public at large. Rebuilding any political party from such low ebb is akin to taking on the labours of Hercules. It is a far cry from the days when the PD’s burst onto the political scene vowing to clean up politics and to adjudicate on their fellow politicians from the High Moral Ground. The High Moral Ground can be a very dangerous and untenable berth as the founders of the Party found to their cost. The cold winds of reality howl at their loudest in the exposed landscape of the High Moral Ground and before long, most sensible people seek the lowlands and some badly needed shelter. Far from inspiring accountability, transparency and probity, the PD’s embarked on a political path that saw them actively and vigorously supporting governments who frequently engaged in questionable activities. As the years passed it appeared to observers that the PD’s were prepared to put up with almost any political outrage in their anxiety to stay in power. That was the rock they perished on. It would take a political colossus to rebuild this most damaged political party and few would be of the opinion that Senator Canon is the right man for the job. The funeral bell is tolling in the distance and the hearse is on its way. One can only hope that the end arrives quickly and mercifully and that we are all spared a protracted vigil at the deathbed of this failed political experiment. Perhaps saddest of all is the fact that the monument that will mark the grave will be one raised by the Minister for Health, Mary Harney, the former leader who promised much but delivered little during her stewardship over the sick, the helpless and the vulnerable. In many ways it is a fitting reminder of years of yet more broken promises and unfulfilled political dreams High moral ground comes at a price While on the subject of the High Moral Ground I’m glad to see that Pat Kenny and his missus managed to reach some sort of accommodation with their neighbours over Gorse Hill. As we all know, there is nothing worse than fighting with your neighbours. Pat would know all about the High Moral Ground. The flagship “Late Late Show” has been the natural amphitheatre for all those who espouse the high moral principles of the moral majority so, as its chief ringmaster, he should have been a bit better prepared for what was likely to happen when he decided to claim adverse possession to the rocky bit of land beside his palatial pile. To my mind it seems a bit of a contradiction to be occupying the High Moral Ground while claiming squatter’s rights to it at the same time. Thankfully the lady judge knocked a few heads together and in the heel of the hunt, Pat and the missus coughed up a few quid and everybody went away relatively happy. I suppose that the best thing to come out of the whole sorry episode is the fact that it has now been conclusively proved that setting up home on the High Moral Ground nearly always means that there is a price to be paid at the end of the day. Powerful mix to drive post-Paisley DUP I’m heading North this week to catch up with a few old friends and to sniff the wind now that Ian Paisley has appointed his successors in the form of Peter Robinson and Nigel Dodds. They will find themselves fully occupied attempting to fill the Big Man’s shoes. But even at this remove I can hear the sigh of relief emanating from the ranks of the Democratic Unionist Party. The DUP may be many things, but it is certainly pragmatic and now that Paisley is gone, some real progress on the political front can begin. Money, pragmatism and power are a very potent mix and with the departure of the founding father, that mix will come fully into play. In the days to come constant injections of British, Irish and European loot will serve to act as a comforting balm and promote a superficial sort of surface healing that just might manage to counterbalance the septic infections of hatreds and bigotries that still infect the body politic. Isn’t money wonderful! Wednesday, April 9th. 2008
Don't dump Mary's pills they might still come in handy I have good news and bad news this week. In keeping with time hallowed tradition I will give you the good news first. The good news is that we should all dump the iodine tablets that were distributed as protection in the event of a nuclear accident six years ago. This cheering news comes courtesy of the Minister for Health, Mary Harney, who says that the risk of such an accident has now subsided. Said Mary: “In 2002, Ireland was the only country to issue iodine tablets to each household and it is now recognized the risks which may have existed then have now been reduced. In particular, there was concern at the time about the vulnerability of the Calder Hall reactors on the Sellafield site. However, these reactors are no longer operational”. So far so good, but now for the bad news! It’s my opinion that rather than dumping the iodine tablets in our household waste as recommended by the Minister, we should instead send them to all those unfortunate people who have the misfortune to be living beneath the flight paths leading into and out of Shannon Airport. It would sadly appear that they might be in bad need of them sooner rather than later. That is because the news of Bertie’s departure has managed to push a story of major significance off the headlines last week. That story which was reported in this newspaper told of how a DC8 cargo plane carrying military supplies to US soldiers in troubled places was observed over Askeaton and other parts trailing plumes of flames from an engine as it struggled to make an emergency landing at Shannon. Thankfully it managed to land safely, but the repercussions of the emergency are somewhat hair raising to put it mildly. An incautious female spokesperson for Murray Air who owns the cargo plane confirmed the incident and added that the company was fully licensed by the Irish authorities to carry hazardous materials – including depleted uranium – through Shannon airport. She did not say if the company had ever flown such materials through Irish airspace but one can safely surmise that it was not laden to the gills with coca cola and chewing gum for the hard-pressed troops. The greatest fear of our ancient Celtic ancestors was that the sky might fall on their heads. But even in their wildest dreams they could not have envisioned a scenario where the falling sky might also contain a cargo plane laden with aviation fuel, high explosives and depleted uranium. This, as they say, represents a horse of a totally different colour. Let me tell you a thing or two about depleted uranium. It is a by-product of the nuclear industry and because of its weight and high density is used to manufacture armour-piercing shells. It is an extremely nasty bugger, in fact the only people to say anything good about it are the American and British military authorities who have and continue to use it in Iraq and Afghanistan right up to the present day. Depleted uranium, known as DU, is a highly dense metal that is the byproduct of the process during which fissionable uranium used to manufacture nuclear bombs and reactor fuel is separated from natural uranium. DU remains radioactive for about 4.5 billion years. Uranium, a weakly radioactive element, occurs naturally in soil and water everywhere on Earth, but mainly in trace quantities. Humans ingest it daily in minute quantities.
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